The ignorance of people is always amazing to me. I once had a lady at a green house ask me how I carried Elizabeth around when she was only one pound (why I brought up her birth weight (Elizabeth's not the nosy lady) is beyond me now). I firmly told this women that Elizabeth was VERY sick and required lots of medical attention and I couldn't hold for for weeks; she was shocked.
A few weeks ago Elizabeth and I were shopping at a craft store. We were getting things for her birthday party, some beads to make jewelry (my new hobby), and t-shirts for the March of Dimes walk. They store didn't carry the correct color and my conversation with the check out women went like this:
I told her why we were walking; she was very excited to tell me "oh! I have a friend who had a baby at 23 weeks or something like that!"
I looked at her for minute then quietly asked if the baby survived.
women- "oh sure (obviously she has no idea that many don't),he was in the hospital for a while (no kidding!!)"
me- "that's great! How is he doing?"
women- "oh fine he is still on oxygen, but I don't think he needs it any more. I think his mom is just over protective and worries to much, I think he has CP too"
me- (eye brows raised to my hair line, inside I am screaming WHAT!!!) "Well, doctors are really the ones who make those calls. They are pretty careful about not keeping kids on oxygen any longer than they need to be. Too much can cause problems. If he is still on oxygen that it is the doctors call and he really does need it" (I was not going to let slide, we preemie moms need to stick together!)
women - "oh"
me - "what is his name?" (you know because I know ALL of the local mirco preemies!)
women- "his name is Hunter"
me- "Hunter! I know Hunter! His mom and I are friends and involved in the same NICU group for our hospital."
After our little exchange I felt so much better. I not only did I defended a wrongly judge mom, but a friend too.
If you haven't seen your baby hooked to machines and tubes, been told your child might not survive the week, if you don't live in fear that the next cold could put them in the hospital, then please don't judge. Yes we buy purell in bulk, avoid crowds, miss family functions to keep our kids away from germs, and drive ourselves CRAZY trying to feed our kids. Sure some people might think that we overreact, are over protective, or just plain crazy; but we have earned that right. Bring on the purell!!
Happy New Year!
8 years ago